Monday, October 21, 2013

i love fall

I love fall. Have I ever mentioned that? (Oh yes, I guess I have... here and here and here.) No matter. It is different every year.

I'm still trying to get used to fall in Texas. It is certainly not as beautiful as fall in the midwest... the leaves change later or not at all, but I do still look forward to the cooler weather. It really makes me feel human again after a long, sweaty Texas summer. 


I haven't mentioned on here until now, but when my daughter was three months old, my husband and I had a long discussion and decided that I would be a stay-at-home-mom. At least while she is little. I feel so silly saying this, but it is HARD! I know working outside the home with a baby or children must be very difficult too, so I am in no way saying this is harder, just that it is way harder than I ever expected. I thought it would be a cake walk. I'd have time to crochet and sew and spend time outdoors, and plenty of time to play with a happy baby, and of course no trouble keeping the house clean and shopping for food and supplies and baking a beautiful healthy supper to put on the table each night. I'll just tell you right now... NOT ENOUGH TIME IN A DAY!! What was I thinking? I can't even go to the bathroom without a screaming baby in the background, let alone clean and cook... and hobbies??! what are they???! 

When you are a SAHM, there is just so much more pressure to be "perfect" and to get everything done. When I was working, if we went out to eat a couple nights instead of making dinner, or I didn't get around to vacuuming for longer than a week, or if we we were low on toiletries for a few days, or whatever, it was no big deal because we both had full-time jobs and we couldn't do it all. The thing is, taking care of a baby IS a full-time job, but people who don't do it all day just don't realize it (that's why daycare costs so much, dude!). Moms - ALL moms, whether they work outside the home or stay home with your kids - need to cut themselves some slack, because our job is 24-7. And that is hard no matter what.

Anyway, I'm happy to tell you that I have finally gotten into something of a groove... though it took a good 6 or 7 months to do. I really don't know if it is my daughter's age, or the change in season or what, but it feels good. I have a schedule for cleaning and cooking that I rarely veer from. I try not to stress if something doesn't get done. I have gotten back to crafting (after baby's bedtime, of course!). We get out of the house almost every day. Life is good.

That is not to say I won't be thrown curveballs here and there. Life with a child is never predictable and things are always changing. But I am trying to roll with the punches. And man, this beautiful weather helps so much!

2 comments:

  1. I just found your blog and have been reading through the archives, and just have to say I totally agree with this post! My daughter was also born in February and I left my job in April. Being a stay at home mom is hard! My daughter is demanding, and I am willing to admit that dusting just doesn't happen. I personally don't believe the 50's sitcom wife with a perfect home and gourmet dinner on the table never existed. I'm really glad I found your blog, and if you ever need someon to commiserate with, I am in a position to understand :)

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    1. Thank you so much for your kind comment! I think it is pressure that I put on myself more than anything, but it is still sometimes hard for me to accept that I just can't get it all done. It's nice to hear from someone who understands! :)

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